Quitting Dip Blog, Thursday November 19th, 2020

[NotSloth]

I started at a very young age, around 12 or 13.  My buddy had gotten his hands on a can of snuff and gave it to me.  I remember trying some as I was riding my bike home from his house.  It only took a few seconds before I was spitting it out and throwing up.  I am not sure why that experience did not save me from ever doing it again.  My body was clearly telling me that this stuff was poison and was trying to get rid of it. 

Over the years I continued to dip, not heavily-  but steadily.  I was still too young to buy it myself, plus I had to sneak around to use it.   As I became more independent after I was able to drive myself around, my usage increased significantly.  I had my own space and my own time, and I didn’t have to sneak into the cedar trees anymore. When I turned 18 is when my casual use turned into a full blown addiction, because I was able to buy it myself.  I remember thinking that I was so cool when I walked in and bought it. After graduation I went to college, and  this would seal my fate.  I remember in the Ag department the janitor lined the bottom of all the trash cans with newspaper.  As we entered class we would grab the trash can and put it in the middle of the desk and everyone within range used it as a spitter during class.  This was the point in my life when dipping seemed to become a part of me.  I was no longer aware of my use, it was second nature, and it was a part of my consciousness.

I eventually graduated, got married and took my first real job.  I was mildly aware of being embarrassed by dipping snuff in the office.  I remember at least hiding my spit cup in my desk.  My wife knew about my dipping, and was disgusted by it, but generally left me alone about it as long as she didn’t see it.  Then came the first kid and I tried to quit dipping at my wife’s request.  I had stopped using, but it was constantly on my mind. I had no plan. One night,  I went to a friend’s house who was still dipping, and BAM! the next thing you know I’m right back where I was.  And it happened exactly like you are thinking... I told myself I could have just one, and after that I told myself that I could buy a can and just use it occasionally... and then you look up and it’s a can a day.  I was hiding it from my wife and when she found out I thought it was over.  My wife took the kid and moved out, for a week or two It was touch and go but we reconciled, and it was business as usual she took an “out of sight out of mind” approach.
 
I looked up one day and on my desk was pictures of my kids, my 40th birthday party invite, and not only one but several spit cups on my desk.  I looked back at my life and told myself, this was it, I’m done letting this control me.   I was about a week in and realized I needed someone to talk to who knew what I was going through.  I looked online for Help and found this website QD.  I had a few growing pains at first, but after several arguments, conversations and course corrections I learned the pathway….. Accountability + Brotherhood = QUIT
 
This website taught me a lot about quitting dip.  Through this process I learned what I didn’t know the first time I had taken a break.  You cannot buy into the lies about nicotine and dipping,  and by that I mean you cannot let your mind tell you that nicotine is anything other than poison.  You have to rewire your brain into thinking about nicotine in a negative way, and not romanticize your years of usage. If you’re so happy with your addiction, why are you reading this?   I also learned that when making your promise here, you are held accountable.  There is no option of using once you have posted your number that day, and that is freeing.  

As I sit back and reflect on quitting dipping, I feel accomplished.  I can’t believe how blind I was about my addiction and how stupid and naïve I was.  Today I no longer think of dipping and find dip and people who use it repulsive.  I am glad to be free from the oppressive control of nicotine, and that I have a community of like minded individuals who have my back because they have been there too.  I look at quitting dipping  as a stepping stone to a life of freedom and am committed to sharing my knowledge with new quitters as they embark on the same journey.
 

The above was written by a member of Quitting Dip. If you are looking for a support group, all of the members here quit dipping using the same process, through the accountability offered by this website, and quitting dipping cold turkey.